I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
