im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
