Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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