Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
