Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
God, I missed his penis.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
