Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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