you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize