I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize