$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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