So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
