haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
