The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
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