Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
my sisters under your porch take her home
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Randomize
