we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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