Nicole vs. Life
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
