I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
