Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize