Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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