How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
