you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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