3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
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