jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Randomize