we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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