return my video game
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
