Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
