Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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