is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
