im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
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