My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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