I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
