So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
