he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
