my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
