OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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