i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Randomize
