i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
