ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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