Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
