how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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