Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
You ate ashes out of my bong
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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