do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
All I want is dick and wine.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
