This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
you traded sex for a burrito?
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
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