my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize
