Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
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