Midget sex pt 2 tonight
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Randomize
