We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
i think i just lost a toe
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
what the fuck happened to the tacos
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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