Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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