so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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