Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
