Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
