I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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